Modern Romance by Aziz Ansari

Modern Romance

Now a New York Times BestsellerA hilarious, thoughtful, and in-depth exploration of the pleasures and perils of modern romance from one of this generation’s sharpest comedic voicesAt some point, every one of us embarks on a journey to find love. We meet people, date, get into and out of relationships, all with the hope of finding someone with whom we share a deep connectio...

Title:Modern Romance
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Edition Language:English

Modern Romance Reviews

  • Kelly (and the Book Boar)

    Find all of my reviews at:

    3.5 Stars

    went on my TBR as soon as I heard rumors of its existence. We’re talking about waiting

    for this damn thing (and also never being able to track down an ARC) . . .

    Quick confession – I never bothered reading the synopsis for this book. I saw Aziz Ansari had a “romance” book coming out and my brain immediately thought it would be something like “Tom Haverford’s Guide to Dating” . . .

    If I would have bothe

    Find all of my reviews at:

    3.5 Stars

    went on my TBR as soon as I heard rumors of its existence. We’re talking about waiting

    for this damn thing (and also never being able to track down an ARC) . . .

    Quick confession – I never bothered reading the synopsis for this book. I saw Aziz Ansari had a “romance” book coming out and my brain immediately thought it would be something like “Tom Haverford’s Guide to Dating” . . .

    If I would have bothered reading the blurb, I would have realized that:

    This book was

    science-y. And not in a bad way either. It was an exploration of how finding a match has morphed from the 1950s to the present – but with an Ansari twist that brought the LOLz:

    begins with Ansari admitting that he’s totally a girl. (HA! Just kidding. Bet that got some of you who have accused Mitchell and I of being women haters here on Goodreads all worked up.) Seriously though, Ansari’s introduction includes him picturing his future with a woman he made out with one night, questioning whether a text message came off too desperate or needy, wondering whether the lack of response to said text message is because of him or because some horrible accident befell his potential soulmate, etc. Basically, he proves in three pages that chicks and dudes are

    when it comes to modern day relationships.

    Then there was a brief trip on the waybackmachine a lá

    which included interviews of nursing home residents regarding how/when/where they met their spouse (there was also a lot of talk about how delicious donuts are in this segment. Mmmmmmm, donuts). I confirmed that I could easily be transplanted to the 1950s since I got married when I was a fetus instead of waiting until I was pushing 30 like modern-day women tend to do. *shrug*

    The book then fast-forwards through the ages to today and the land of terrifying technology . . .

    It covered everything from the mind games of not immediately responding to text messages in order to not appear desperate, to how modern romance works in countries other than ‘Murica, to online dating (I’m telling you, if it gets any easier than Tinder y’all single folks might as well just buy sex robots and save yourself the time and effort of leaving the house), to

    snooping on your significant other . . .

    and reminded readers that you might not always get a boner every time you touch your beloved’s hair, but that doesn’t mean you’re “settling.”

    If you’re looking for a laugh a second book of Ansari’s hits and misses when it comes to the romance game, this probably isn’t the choice for you. However, if you’re interested in a sociological study of how dating has evolved over time with some humor added in to the mix, this one’s a winner. And really – who can pass up getting to know a little more about Aziz Ansari’s outlook on love . . .

    ^^^crosses fingers^^^^

  • emma

    i posted, i posted, i posted! plz be proud of me. link here:

    ------------

    Disclaimer: I have the biggest crush on Aziz Ansari. Can anyone blame me? He’s like a humor magician. Parks & Rec, flawless standup specials, MASTER OF NONE, and this book. What a track record.

    Anyway. I could never claim to be unbiased on this subject. It’s now clear that what I thought was a post-season 2 Master of None hangover is just...part of me now. I am destined for an exis

    i posted, i posted, i posted! plz be proud of me. link here:

    ------------

    Disclaimer: I have the biggest crush on Aziz Ansari. Can anyone blame me? He’s like a humor magician. Parks & Rec, flawless standup specials, MASTER OF NONE, and this book. What a track record.

    Anyway. I could never claim to be unbiased on this subject. It’s now clear that what I thought was a post-season 2 Master of None hangover is just...part of me now. I am destined for an existence of crushin’ on Aziz.

    Okay. So now that you know I cannot be trusted, we can get into this. (This is, by the way, contrary to my typical off-the-charts levels of trustworthiness. I am often called Emma “Very Accurate and Fair Reviews” Insertmylastnamehere. That’s the level of dependability I’m rockin’.)

    First: GO WITH THE AUDIOBOOK.

    Now, you may be thinking,

    And I hear ya, voice-of-an-imaginary-reader-that-is-becoming-a-motif-in-my-reviews. Previously, I was

    (Insert gasp from the crowd here.)

    Recently, you may have seen, I discovered that I had seven (count ’em!) audiobook credits to my name. And that they would be expiring shortly. And so I lived my best extreme-couponer life, and posted a status asking for recommendations.

    came THRU.

    She suggested I check out the audiobook version of Modern Romance - that’s this book! - and because a) I am Aziz Ansari trash and b) I had lightly planned on rereading this during my 2017 Reread Extravaganza, I enthusiastically concurred.

    WHICH WAS THE RIGHT CHOICE. (Thanks again, Sofi. You’re the goods.)

    In my initial review, I gave this book three-ish stars. That’s because, while the book was interesting, it could get very nonfiction-y. (I’m not that big into nonfiction. How’d you guess?) It generally lacked for Aziz’s voice.

    Guess what’s not a problem in the audiobook version?

    IT’S AZIZ ANSARI’S VOICE. Because he reads it. And riffs. And jokes about the laziness of audiobook listeners. (This is particularly fabulous for me, as someone who read the book first, because I get to laugh pretentiously and condescendingly - which is my favorite kind of laughter.) The whole thing is great and I love it so much. Honestly, it’s like a six-hour podcast about love hosted by Aziz Ansari. And that’s a dream I never knew I had.

    This book isn’t

    , but think about the impossibility of the task. Ansari and his co-author, Eric Klinenberg, set about to write a book that encapsulates and explains ALL OF MODERN ROMANCE, EVERYWHERE. And on TOP of it, discuss the history of romance and the changes that led us here. They had to place some limits on it.

    Unfortunately, these limits mean we mostly hear about the Tinder-esque romances formed by straight American twentysomethings. I’d love to hear more about non-straight relationships, or even non-online relationships. But I understand the need to focus on a niche.

    One AMAZING thing about this book is that it isn’t

    American. Klinenberg and Ansari visited several other countries to try to get a more global concept, and IT. IS. FASCINATING. Honestly I want the two of them to write a million books like this. Just explain every aspect of society and culture to me via six-hour audiobook, Aziz.

    The only other downside is that this has a loooot of material from Aziz Ansari’s most-recent-and-still-fairly-old standup special, which I had just watched (okay, rewatched) like a week before starting the audiobook. So that was a lil upsetting. Like John Mulaney’s tragically short-lived self-titled TV show - I’d be

    much more on board if I hadn’t heard half of it before.

    Bottom line: THIS IS SO FUN, but you

    try the audiobook. 200% more Aziz, and trust me when I say you want as much Aziz as you can get.

    ----------ORIGINAL REVIEW----------

    3/5

    the topic of this book was so interesting! i don't think i was alone, however, in expecting a little more aziz in it. it was definitely funnier/an easier read than your typical sociological study but it definitely had its dry portions. all in all worth it, though!

  • Anne

    So, this isn't really a

    book about Aziz Ansari's dating experiences, it's more like a book about dating in the modern world, written by the very

    Aziz Ansari.

    I was introduced to Aziz's stand-up by my oldest son, and I've been hooked on him ever since. He's hilarious, and if you haven't seen him perform you're missing out. Which makes me wish I'd listened to this as an audiobook...

    Turns out, Aziz and his partner, Eric Klinenberg, did quite a bit of research for this book. Now, is

    So, this isn't really a

    book about Aziz Ansari's dating experiences, it's more like a book about dating in the modern world, written by the very

    Aziz Ansari.

    I was introduced to Aziz's stand-up by my oldest son, and I've been hooked on him ever since. He's hilarious, and if you haven't seen him perform you're missing out. Which makes me wish I'd listened to this as an audiobook...

    Turns out, Aziz and his partner, Eric Klinenberg, did quite a bit of research for this book. Now, is it the

    book out there on this subject? The most detailed investigation with the most clinical data?

    But there was

    more research-y stuff in here than I was expecting from a book written by a stand-up comedian & actor. Between the two of them, they did focus groups, had pie charts, and looked at how people dated in a few different cultures. Not a ton, but a few!

    Japan (Tokyo, in particular) was interesting! I'd heard about their lack of interest in sex, but I didn't realize it was now such a big deal that the government was stepping in to help out. You'd think Tokyo would be a hopping place for singles, but evidently...not so much.

    Even so, it sounds like a

    place to visit!

    They looked at Paris to see what a more

    culture thought about monogamy, and the results were...less surprising.

    More Parisians were cool with (a bit of) cheating than other countries.

    They also looked at Buenos Aries, which is (supposedly) a more aggressive city for dating. As in, the guys are aggressive and take catcalling to a whole new level. Or maybe it's a game both genders play in that culture?

    Either way, catcalling is gross, disrespectful, and not the way to meet your soul mate. <--just my opinion.

    Now, if you've ever seen Ansari's stand-up, you've probably seen him get someone out of the audience and scroll through their texts.

    is like Aziz scrolling through thousands of personal texts to see what people are saying to each other. What's dating like for singles when there are so many ways to communicate? When everything is instantaneous? When you can swipe a face to connect, or send out mass generic messages on a dating site?

    How do you connect without being a needy dork or a creeper?

    What

    the correct etiquette?

    Can you break up via text? Or ask someone to the prom in an IM?

    Are those, in fact,

    methods of communications?!

    Is love in the digital age

    or

    ? Are singles making rookie mistakes that knock them out of them out of the game, or is the game itself a tad more full of potential landmines than it was when I was single?

    As Aziz points out, these stupid blunders just

    have happened 20 years ago.

    The point he makes is that the landscape for dating has changed...again. And I'm sure it will continue to morph and alter into something unrecognizable in another 20 years. That's not necessarily a bad thing, at all. In fact, there are upsides (searching for someone you connect with on a deep level, instead of settling) and downsides (expecting too much from one person, and not being satisfied) when it comes to Modern Romance.

    Admittedly, I had no

    reason to want to read a book about dating.

    I'm not looking for love because I already had my very Unmodern Romance.

    I simply wanted to take a peek at how the other half lives. And it was pretty enlightening! No, I don't feel sorry for the singles out there today. I don't think it's any harder, but it's definitely

    for them than it was for me. Every era has its own pitfalls, but in the end, I think we all want the same thing.

  • Snoon Mcwilliams

    Startlingly inessential.

    Early on, Ansari makes a somewhat baffling statement that he felt compelled to write this book because there wasn't any other literature on modern dating culture-- a topic explored ad nauseum in newspaper thinkpieces, podcasts, and other disposable pop science bestsellers (many of which he goes on to reference throughout the book). He also mentions that he rejected the idea of writing a strictly humorous book because he feels like his stand-up is a more comfortable medium

    Startlingly inessential.

    Early on, Ansari makes a somewhat baffling statement that he felt compelled to write this book because there wasn't any other literature on modern dating culture-- a topic explored ad nauseum in newspaper thinkpieces, podcasts, and other disposable pop science bestsellers (many of which he goes on to reference throughout the book). He also mentions that he rejected the idea of writing a strictly humorous book because he feels like his stand-up is a more comfortable medium for his comedy ideas and only agreed to do the project if he could center it on serious sociological inquiry.

    What results is a broad roundup of research studies on shifting attitudes toward marriage and dating, some case studies done through focus groups and Reddit, and a few interviews with social scientists. Unfortunately, the most acute problem with the book is that it's wholly free of any sort of insight or critique. Have you ever thought about the fact that previous generations lived, loved, and died within a narrow geographic and cultural range while today technology allows us to learn about and connect with an almost limitless array of other people and ideas? Would it surprise you to learn that some people in bygone eras felt stifled by limited options while others were content with what was available to them, while some in the current generation feel liberated and others feel paralyzed by choice? It wouldn't?

    The flatness of the science could be forgiven if the book was funny, but it isn't. Ansari mostly limits himself to joking asides (and even follows most of those up with qualifying statements that they're not meant to be construed as part of the research, as if he or co-author Eric Klinenberg were deathly afraid of being discredited by satirical factoids like saying 0.8% of all couples met on the set of the Nicolas Cage movie Snake Eyes), which seldom rise above observations at the level of "Have you ever texted someone and then they don't text back right away? What is the deal with that??". On the whole, his efforts to ground the book in sociological exploration torpedo the humor and the book ultimately doesn't succeed as science or satire.

    I suppose this would be easy to dismiss as the latest in a long tradition of disposable novelty bathroom reading written by comedians, but knowing that Ansari was given a $3.5 MILLION book deal to produce it can't help but rankle. Save your time-- there's nothing insightful or memorable here at all.

  • Sarah Jane

    I think Aziz Ansari just convinced me to get on Tinder?

  • Stephanie *Very Stable Genius*

    I am a satisfied single.

    I did not coin that term, I did hear it from somewhere, but I don’t remember who said it. Sorry person who said it. Anyway.....what this means to me is that I’m fine with being on my own. It’s easy. Would I like to meet ‘the love of my life’ or ‘the man of my dreams’ my 'soul mate' if you will? Sure, I’d be alright with that, in fact it would be great. But I'm not holding my breath.

    Am I willing to spend hours and hours poring over profiles, reading messages from guys that

    I am a satisfied single.

    I did not coin that term, I did hear it from somewhere, but I don’t remember who said it. Sorry person who said it. Anyway.....what this means to me is that I’m fine with being on my own. It’s easy. Would I like to meet ‘the love of my life’ or ‘the man of my dreams’ my 'soul mate' if you will? Sure, I’d be alright with that, in fact it would be great. But I'm not holding my breath.

    Am I willing to spend hours and hours poring over profiles, reading messages from guys that put little to no effort into writing them? Nope. I have better things to do. But if I stumble upon my prince charming by chance? Cool.

    “The world is available to us, but that may be the problem.” Truth. It’s exhausting.

    In Modern Romance, Aziz explorers and compares how people once found one another to how we painstakingly do today and he does a damn fine job of it. And he’s really funny too.

    “People who own iPhones are twice as likely to sext as people who use Androids.” Huh…who knew?

    “The most popular time to sext is Tuesday between 10:00 A.M. and noon. Yes, we looked this up twice. Strange!” Again……huh.

    “We have two selves: a real-world self and a phone self, and the nonsense our phone selves do can make our real-world selves look like idiots. Our real-world selves and our phone selves go hand in hand. Act like a dummy with your phone self and send some thoughtless message full of spelling errors, and the real-world self will pay the price. The person on the other end sees no difference between your two selves. They never think, Oh, I’m sure he’s much more intelligent and thoughtful in person. This is just his “lazy phone persona.”

    I have the best example of this from some guy who was trying to ‘git wit me’. Seriously. Trying to impress me and this is what he put forth…..never mind that he never, not once, asked me a question about myself. There was a bunch of attempts before this but this is where I was trying to get him to have a conversation….ask something…anything.

    “Guy: Just dont wanna be a pest. Juzy tell me to go away. Hsha

    Me: You’re a nice enough guy [name redacted], I’m just confused on why you’re interested in me. I have no idea if we have anything in common….what do you think we might have in common? What are your interests….your views?

    Guy: Juzt looking for someone to someone to hang with. Nothing huge. Conversaytion share interest. Love the fsct ur artsy. U seem passionste bout what u do. And easy to look at. Im harmless. I dint bite

    Guy: I work afternoons during thr week. Love to do an art walk in lakrwood or something. Then walk the state park thete. Just a thoygjt”

    WHAT THE HELL? Needless to say I did not go out with this guy who ‘dint’ bite and have a ‘conversaytion’ with him…..I wasn’t sure I’d understand him. Look, I suck at spelling, but I know for a fact that devices today help a person out with that problem. In fact you would have to try pretty hard to screw up that bad. AND I hate, hate, hate, the ‘ur’ and ‘u’…..people, you’re phone will helpfully put the word ‘you’ up on the top there for you if typing three letters is too much work for you!

    Huff…..huff….huff…. why even try at all sir if that is the best you can do? I’m 99.9% sure this guy will never read this review. At least I hope so.

    I’ll end this with one last quote:

    “Marriage was an economic institution in which you were given a partnership for life in terms of children and social status and succession and companionship. But now we want our partner to still give us all these things, but in addition I want you to be my best friend and my trusted confidant and my passionate lover to boot, and we live twice as long. So we come to one person, and we basically are asking them to give us what once an entire village used to provide: Give me belonging, give me identity, give me continuity, but give me transcendence and mystery and awe all in one. Give me comfort, give me edge. Give me novelty, give me familiarity. Give me predictability, give me surprise. And we think it’s a given, and toys and lingerie are going to save us with that. Ideally, though, we’re lucky, and we find our soul mate and enjoy that life-changing mother lode of happiness. But a soul mate is a very hard thing to find.”

    That’s a lot to ask. I was pleasantly surprised by how good this book was. Enjoy.

  • Nandakishore Varma

    I got married in 1989. In India in those days, "love" marriages were still exceptions rather than the norm: when you had to look at the religion, caste, family background, and age of a possible partner who was to share your life (divorces were absolute stigma!) before hitching up, falling in love was like solving a mathematical equation with too many constraints. For a nerdy, uncouth, shy and bookish youngster who got tongue-tied in presence of a halfway-pretty girl, this was even more of a nigh

    I got married in 1989. In India in those days, "love" marriages were still exceptions rather than the norm: when you had to look at the religion, caste, family background, and age of a possible partner who was to share your life (divorces were absolute stigma!) before hitching up, falling in love was like solving a mathematical equation with too many constraints. For a nerdy, uncouth, shy and bookish youngster who got tongue-tied in presence of a halfway-pretty girl, this was even more of a nightmare.

    Fortunately, as an educated young man from an aristocratic family, with a good job to boot, my prospects on the marriage market were bright. In the world of arranged marriages, I was “hot property”. Like Mr. Bingley and Mr. Darcy in

    , mothers with daughters of marriageable age who knew my mother or father considered me as the rightful property of their daughters. Discussions of “possible alliances” were rife, and my mother was having to fend off quite a few of her more aggressive friends.

    Even though it gave my ego a sort of boost to be so sought after, in my heart of hearts I was intimidated by the thought of marriage. On the one hand, I was an incurable romantic, always falling in love with a pretty girl and writing bad poetry; on the other, my cynical and sarcastic self continuously mocked me. Also, as a rebellious liberal, I was against the whole concept of “arranged” marriages. So I shied away from all the proposals, giving the excuse that I was not ready.

    One day in February 1989, I went into my favourite bookshop and came across an unbelievable book sale where I picked up a bunch of absolutely awesome books for a pittance. I came home, drunk on my luck, when my mother told me that a marriage proposal had come from her classmate and close friend, for her daughter. In the euphoria of getting all those cool tomes, I agreed to see the girl’s photo.

    I got it a couple of days later, just took one look at it, and fell head over heels in love. A meeting was arranged the coming week; we talked to each other for around 20 minutes and hey presto! I was engaged. We got married that December.

    We have been together ever since. So I always wonder: is romance all it’s cracked up to be?

    ---------------

    Pardon this lengthy episode about my marital journey. I was continuously reminded of the “good old days” while reading this book, especially when I read this:

    In the current world of internet dating, I would still probably be “swiping right” on a dating app, looking for that perfect girl waiting out there for me.

    Aziz Ansari has done a wonderful job of explaining how the digital world has invaded the romantic arena. In olden days, the only hope of meeting a possible partner was out in the real world. If you were a caveman, you just banged the nearest attractive female on the head and dragged her into your cave: in more modern times, you met her in family gatherings, at the workplace and later on, in singles bars. However, since you were geographically limited, there was a limit to your romantic territory. The upside? People got married with someone they found reasonably attractive and settled down.

    Now, with the advent of the internet, the sky is literally the limit. People can visit dating sites; with dating apps like Tinder, just swiping right on an attractive picture is enough. If the other person also swipes right, you are practically hitched.

    (This is happening a lot in India too. We have marriage sites where you can filter down the choices caste and state-wise, and pick up a romance which will be easily approved by family. People have started calling them “arranged” love marriages. Talk about oxymorons!)

    However, the downside of this infinite choice that one keeps on window-shopping. Less and less people settle down – they remain digital Casanovas throughout their life. The relative anonymity provided by computers have a helped a lot of nerdy types get in on the act: so while romance has flourished, marriage has taken a hit. And it does not help that even adultery has become easier with the advent of sexting!

    My main problem with this book is that Ansari continuously tries to do his stand-up comedy act. It is not needed – the subject is fascinating by itself. And the jokes fall rather flat in the print medium, I must say.

    ---------------

    Oh, one last thing – if I had started my romantic life after the advent of goodreads, I would hazard a guess and say that I’d still be single. I am so hopelessly in love with most of the wonderful ladies out here, that I’d still be debating on whom to bang on the head and drag into my cave. :D

  • Diane

    Aziz Ansari is a funny guy. I've enjoyed his work as an actor and a comedian, so I shouldn't have been surprised when I really liked his book.

    But I was surprised, especially when I learned that he had teamed up with a sociologist and did actual research on modern romance. Aziz was interested in how technology has changed dating culture, and he opens the book with a funny story about a girl, Tanya, who didn't text him back after he had asked her out. He realizes that texting and social media and

    Aziz Ansari is a funny guy. I've enjoyed his work as an actor and a comedian, so I shouldn't have been surprised when I really liked his book.

    But I was surprised, especially when I learned that he had teamed up with a sociologist and did actual research on modern romance. Aziz was interested in how technology has changed dating culture, and he opens the book with a funny story about a girl, Tanya, who didn't text him back after he had asked her out. He realizes that texting and social media and dating apps and emojis have become increasingly important in dating and relationships, and he and a sociologist set out to research the subject.

    For example, they conducted interviews with people from a wide variety of ages and backgrounds, and they even traveled to other countries to get some international data on romance. One aspect of their research I found especially interesting was that online dating sites and apps, such as Match.com and Tinder, have dramatically increased the number of options for people, but having so many choices can be overwhelming. It makes it harder for some people to choose someone, because there are always more profiles to check. One woman told the story of how she would check Tinder before going a date, just in case she saw someone more interesting than the guy she was supposed to meet.

    I also liked the perspective of elderly folks who were interviewed. Overwhelmingly, the women who got married young wished they hadn't been pressured to find a husband so quickly. Even in cases where the women had relatively happy marriages, they felt a sense of loss because they didn't get a chance to experience being single in their 20s, or have time to live independently, without relying on a parent or a husband to support them.

    I love sociology, and I thought this book was a delightful blend of Aziz's humor and sociological insights. I listened to this on audio, and Aziz was a very funny performer. He had me laughing within the first minute, and this book made a long road trip seem very short. I would recommend it to anyone interested in the sociology of dating, or who also wants a good laugh.

  • Elyse

    At the beginning of the audiobook, Aziz joked with 'us listeners', about being

    "Lazy People"......too lazy to sit down and read a book. He not only had to write the

    book, but now he 'had' to read it us us too!

    Aziz is entertaining and hilarious no questions about it. Love the guy!

    By the end of my 'lazy- listening'... I came to the conclusion that Aziz brought playfulness and lightness to the game called "Modern Dating".

    However ...'everyone' could benefit listening to this audio tape if you pla

    At the beginning of the audiobook, Aziz joked with 'us listeners', about being

    "Lazy People"......too lazy to sit down and read a book. He not only had to write the

    book, but now he 'had' to read it us us too!

    Aziz is entertaining and hilarious no questions about it. Love the guy!

    By the end of my 'lazy- listening'... I came to the conclusion that Aziz brought playfulness and lightness to the game called "Modern Dating".

    However ...'everyone' could benefit listening to this audio tape if you plan to continue living in 2016 and years after.

    Listening to the different ways people interact through 'texting', opened up my eyes to the generation gap between - me, and my younger generation. I grew up talking on the telephone -- hours a night as a teenager. Every teenage girls dream was to own a princess phone of their own - next to their bed in the mid 60's. I talked with boys, girls, ( one on one), regularly. If a boy had interest in me ...he didn't send a text and say, "hey"

    or "hey, what's hanging?" or "you want to hang out." Guys had to speak .. be more direct ...such as, "hi, would you like to go to a movie with me on Friday night?" Point is... Social connecting was either in person or on the phone. We didn't have instant messages- text messages to hide behind.

    I was almost 'shocked' ( but not really), that Aziz was actually TEACHING basic

    appropriate communication -social skills 101 of how to communicate just sending a text message without sounding like a jerk. (He was doing a great job with many terrific real- examples showing what worked and what didn't work).

    It's somewhat mind blowing to me that basic common sense skills need to be taught to young single men and women at all! ( AZIZ's refresher course is needed, no question about it). He also made it fun! Nobody gets called out -- this isn't a live seminar.

    When Aziz explored the changes of dating, romance , and marriage with the previous 50 years...a couple of things stood out as interesting to me.

    1. There was a high statistic of people marrying a person who lived in their neighborhood. It was common to marry a person less than 5 minutes from where you grew up.

    2. When asked "why did you marry your wife?" ...years ago: many of the answers were similar: "She was nice, we liked each other, and had common values".

    Today: when asked ...""why did you marry your spouse?"...we hear answers like

    1. He's the other half of me.., and,

    2. She's my soulmate.

    At the start of this book, I said to myself ..."This book is fun, & informative ...I can talk to my daughters about these issues...ask them questions.. etc..,

    yet, I'm soooo happy that I AM MARRIED.. ( and happy)

    In the middle of the book...still enjoying this clever-wise-comedian, and his heterosexual pairing with graphs to boot...I quietly said to myself ...

    YEP, STILL GLAD I'M MARRIED!!

    At the end of the audiobook...Having enjoyed a discussion about the beginning's attraction of a great relationship with lust and passion...then moving into the

    companion phase ----which is next to follow if the couple stays together...

    Or?

    might a person move on to another person? Keep that 'Rush' and 'fire' hot?

    Science makes a good argument for the companion phase.

    To me, the dating world seems over- stimulating -- too many choices -to the point of maybe not really knowing anyone.

    Boy next door doesn't look so bad!

    I'M 'still' happy TO BE MARRIED... ( yet, I suppose there would be nothing worse if a person wished they weren't). I'm blessed in the marriage dept. and I'll be the first to say it. We are both independent - individual - complete whole healthy- soulful human beings ... yet we are emotionally connected with each other in the important areas of life.

    I enjoyed my lazy time with Aziz. ( THANKS for reading your book to me Aziz).

    Aziz is a great walking buddy! You don't even need to text him for a date.

    Aziz's TV show "MASTER OF NONE", is funny, truthful as hell, with a great cast!

  • Khadidja Megaache

    As a single woman I feel like Aziz Ansari knows my pain. Yes I am single by choice ( not my choice, but still a choice) , He knows how unpleasant it is to stare impotently at a screen waiting for a message that never arrives “we all have Tanya on our phones”

    As a single woman I feel like Aziz Ansari knows my pain. Yes I am single by choice ( not my choice, but still a choice) , He knows how unpleasant it is to stare impotently at a screen waiting for a message that never arrives “we all have Tanya on our phones”

     the author teamed up with sociologist Klinenberg to design and conduct a research project to better understand the dating game as it's played today. Their research program included focus groups and interviews with hundreds of people in big and small cities , They set up a discussion forum on the social networking websites, interviewed experts, consulted books on sociology, psychology and human behavior.

    the book deals with online dating

    * LMAO* :D

    Also the books deals with the struggle of finding your soul mate ,Asking them out, dumping, sexting cheating and snooping on your partner. And the differences between marriages now and then, Emerging adulthood, and lots interesting things about dating in our technology-saturated age. I loved every second of this audiobook, Aziz is such a funny actor/comedian


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